I race my friend to the movie theater door and open it for him. “Such a gentleman,” he jokes.
He likes to open doors for me. Carry heavy things so I don’t have to. Pull out my chair now and then. I appreciate these gestures and see them as his quiet way of saying “I’m looking out for you.” It’s nice. Refreshing.
I have two arguments for people who are super old-fashioned and gung-ho about chivalry though.
1. Don’t make me feel like I’m weak, and helpless, and in need a strong and hefty man to help me accomplish the most mediocre daily tasks.
2. There is nothing wrong with me being “chivalrous” towards guys.
My friend, who really is a gentleman, is obviously a chivalrous kind of guy. But he also understands that I like to carry heavy things, and open doors, and get my own chair most of the time – and he doesn’t have an inkling of a problem with that. He’s not saying “I’m looking out for you… because you’re incapable of doing all these things for yourself.” He’s saying “I’m looking out for you… because even though I’m totally aware of your capability to open doors, I’m going to do it anyway because it’s my way of letting you know that I care.”
That’s what makes all the difference.